And then this happened!

 Remember how I had recently written about the damage done to little hearts. I was upset about the way I was made to feel less by my classmates as a kid. Just today, as I opened my Instagram, I read a message from the same girl, well a woman now, who made me feel that I was really dark-skinned and kids should not play with me. Imagine my surprise. She saw an Insta post I had recently shared of my husband returning to the UK and so she decided to contact me about it. She asked me to visit her in London, I too politely said that she should visit us here. What I actually wanted to write was - some guts! Making me feel horrible all throughout my childhood only to act all fake and nice once we have grown up. 

I won't lie, a part of me started feeling, for lack of a better word, worthy of all the attention. All because my husband is good-looking, people now want to be friends with me. I know, a really stupid thought, but this is the first thing that came into my head. Remember how when as kids, we had a shiny new toy and that made all the other kids gravitate towards us. For a moment, I felt like that kid. Feeling haughty, I decided to walk up to my friend, a fellow scientist who has his shit together, unlike me, to narrate him the entire incident. He heard all that I had to share very patiently and said the three words I did not expect anyone to say to me - " Let it go!". For a second there, I was really mad at him, why would he take her side. He is my friend, he should be on my side. But maybe, just maybe, he had a point. He explained to me how whatever she had said to me as a 7-year-old probably was a reason of her upbringing, and not who she really was. So I should not hold that against her. The fact that she reached out to me after all these years goes to show that she probably even does not remember this incident. 

How do you become mature enough to fight for what broke you in the first place? Should I really let it go? Can I really let it go? I have been holding on to this grudge for so long now, what happens when I let it go? 

I am glad now I have friends who love me for me, and not for the way I look. And, a loving husband who is my best friend in the whole world. 

Guess now I do need to think if I want to let it go or want to hold on to it. 

Still, never meeting her ever again! Cause knowing me, I will not hold back from telling her how she made me feel disgusting as a little girl, while, all that I ever wanted to do was to be included. I truly hope that I never ever ever make anyone feel like that.

Love, 

Aaliyah 

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