I have a BLOG!!!!!! Finally ;)
Well for those of you who don't know what is Meena Kumari complex,let me shed a little light on it.
Meena Kumari was an Indian movie actress and a poetess. She is regarded as one of the most prominent actresses to have appeared on the screens of Hindi Cinema.She did many grief stricken and tragic roles.
Media referred to her as "The Tragedy Queen".My mom knows so much about her,even Wikipedia would fail in front of her ;) (But she doesn't know for a fact that her daughter is suffering from a complex so complicated ;) )
Meena Kumari Complex is a case where a person loves to obsess about their problems.Where each problem seems so big that the fact that a solution might even exist seems unbelievable.So much so that these problems become our friends.The problems which might seem to be non existent for others seem as important as the Board Examinations.This is followed by a series of long chats with the people we confide in,lots and lots of guilt free indulgence in chocolate,writing real sad long poems(which nobody but us can interpret) and lots and lots and lots of crying.
So in short,it is a case where let's say for example I love to feel sad about all the things which go wrong in my life.And I love to hold on to this feeling so tight that I plan my entire day around my problems.
I REALLY REALLY REALLY HAVE MEENA KUMARI COMPLEX!!!!!
The sad part is that it took me a movie to realise this.
Now that I've done a fairly nice job in explaining Meena Kumari complex I'm really going to prove it that I love being miserable.My brain works that way! It seriously does.Whenever I try to narrate my problems( which are like so many that when a day has no problems at all,I start worrying that something is really wrong.And then I wait for something bad to happen ) all that people have got to say is "WHY DO YOU THINK SO MUCH!!!!!!!!! " To this my brain replies "HOW CAN I NOT THINK SO MUCH???!!!!????"
Can my brain ever sit idle??? It's not like I've not tried meditating.Well,I've actually never tried meditating.Some people are incapable of meditating,I guess I am one of them.Even as I am typing this,there are so many things going on in my mind.Would somebody,in fact anybody read this???
See this is my problem, I EXPECT TOO MUCH!!!! Well it's not me,it's my brain.And my heart too.What happens with me is that I react first and I think later.When I get a signal from my heart,it reaches my mouth( in case of verbal communication ) or it reaches my hand(in case of typing ) before it reaches my brain.And I am clearly the most honest and frank person people have ever come across.And trust me,I end up feeling like a complete fool most of the times.I do stuff before analysing.The part which actually amuses me is the fact that I am studying to become an Analyst.(I am studying to become an analyst,not that I want to be one.I am still in one of those phases where one day I feel like becoming a marine biologist and the other day I feel like becoming an environmentalist.And then there are days when I feel like doing nothing.Just sleep :) )
I ACT WITHOUT THINKING!!!!!
And then I regret.I didn't kill anyone,in case it appears as a confession of a girl regretting of murdering someone she disliked.Hey,I should've named my blog "Confessions of a girl so messed up that even the word messed up seems so lame " Nah,that would be like too big.As it is no one would read it,so why bother if I name it this or Meena Kumari complex.
Now that I am finally writing I've realised there is so much to share.And hey,I just smiled.I finally smiled.My first smile in so so so many days.I had become the Carrie Bradshaw of Sex And The City when Big left her on the day of their wedding.Nah!It's nothing related to my love life.I messed up things real bad with a close friend.And now that I am getting a cold shoulder,I can't handle it.I can't make anyone fall in love with me.It's for them to decide.Right??? but then why is it so difficult to accept this simple logic.
When people say " IF IT'S MEANT TO BE,IT WILL BE ",it just goes over my head.How can anyone not be eager to no that if it would be or not??? Hence I am impatient and impulsive.So I've been told by many of my friends.
As I am obsessing about my problems,my dog just got an epileptic attack.And I thought I had problems.Still,I will obsess over mine later.
Meena Kumari was an Indian movie actress and a poetess. She is regarded as one of the most prominent actresses to have appeared on the screens of Hindi Cinema.She did many grief stricken and tragic roles.
Media referred to her as "The Tragedy Queen".My mom knows so much about her,even Wikipedia would fail in front of her ;) (But she doesn't know for a fact that her daughter is suffering from a complex so complicated ;) )
Meena Kumari Complex is a case where a person loves to obsess about their problems.Where each problem seems so big that the fact that a solution might even exist seems unbelievable.So much so that these problems become our friends.The problems which might seem to be non existent for others seem as important as the Board Examinations.This is followed by a series of long chats with the people we confide in,lots and lots of guilt free indulgence in chocolate,writing real sad long poems(which nobody but us can interpret) and lots and lots and lots of crying.
So in short,it is a case where let's say for example I love to feel sad about all the things which go wrong in my life.And I love to hold on to this feeling so tight that I plan my entire day around my problems.
I REALLY REALLY REALLY HAVE MEENA KUMARI COMPLEX!!!!!
The sad part is that it took me a movie to realise this.
Now that I've done a fairly nice job in explaining Meena Kumari complex I'm really going to prove it that I love being miserable.My brain works that way! It seriously does.Whenever I try to narrate my problems( which are like so many that when a day has no problems at all,I start worrying that something is really wrong.And then I wait for something bad to happen ) all that people have got to say is "WHY DO YOU THINK SO MUCH!!!!!!!!! " To this my brain replies "HOW CAN I NOT THINK SO MUCH???!!!!????"
Can my brain ever sit idle??? It's not like I've not tried meditating.Well,I've actually never tried meditating.Some people are incapable of meditating,I guess I am one of them.Even as I am typing this,there are so many things going on in my mind.Would somebody,in fact anybody read this???
See this is my problem, I EXPECT TOO MUCH!!!! Well it's not me,it's my brain.And my heart too.What happens with me is that I react first and I think later.When I get a signal from my heart,it reaches my mouth( in case of verbal communication ) or it reaches my hand(in case of typing ) before it reaches my brain.And I am clearly the most honest and frank person people have ever come across.And trust me,I end up feeling like a complete fool most of the times.I do stuff before analysing.The part which actually amuses me is the fact that I am studying to become an Analyst.(I am studying to become an analyst,not that I want to be one.I am still in one of those phases where one day I feel like becoming a marine biologist and the other day I feel like becoming an environmentalist.And then there are days when I feel like doing nothing.Just sleep :) )
I ACT WITHOUT THINKING!!!!!
And then I regret.I didn't kill anyone,in case it appears as a confession of a girl regretting of murdering someone she disliked.Hey,I should've named my blog "Confessions of a girl so messed up that even the word messed up seems so lame " Nah,that would be like too big.As it is no one would read it,so why bother if I name it this or Meena Kumari complex.
Now that I am finally writing I've realised there is so much to share.And hey,I just smiled.I finally smiled.My first smile in so so so many days.I had become the Carrie Bradshaw of Sex And The City when Big left her on the day of their wedding.Nah!It's nothing related to my love life.I messed up things real bad with a close friend.And now that I am getting a cold shoulder,I can't handle it.I can't make anyone fall in love with me.It's for them to decide.Right??? but then why is it so difficult to accept this simple logic.
When people say " IF IT'S MEANT TO BE,IT WILL BE ",it just goes over my head.How can anyone not be eager to no that if it would be or not??? Hence I am impatient and impulsive.So I've been told by many of my friends.
As I am obsessing about my problems,my dog just got an epileptic attack.And I thought I had problems.Still,I will obsess over mine later.
i feel lik am typin ol dis so i gues i hv dis meena kumari thng too :p
ReplyDeleteGood to know that I'm not alone :)
Delete:) :) you do have it. I was in the same phase a year back.. i too messed up with a close friend. i dont know what i was thinking and what i was doing, saying.. and what not..
ReplyDeletehead is as usual mess.
Its so difficult for us to accept the way things are... dont know, how many permutation/combination god had to to before he designed mind like us ... its crazy.. if i trace back my thoughts.. i myself get annoyed at me.. that why do I think so much... :( :(
Some people are just made that way :) We are one of them. I envy the people who do not bother about the things going around them. Its like they are immune to all their problems. But that's ok. I can't imagine a day which would go by with me not fretting about the petty issues I have to deal with. :P I am in love with the idea of thinking ;)
DeleteI totally agree. You are EXACTLY what u hv mentioned. U do hv this complex :D
ReplyDeleteYou so know yourself (add this fact to the very few reasons u hv To Be Happy ;) )
I have you,more than enuf reason to be happy for the rest of my life :) :* <3
DeleteOmg..too much to digest for me ;) but love u :*
ReplyDeleteI loved reading this entry. Came to this blog from wiki article about Meena Kumari. Go on girl :)
ReplyDeleteThank u so mch :) m glad u liked it :)
DeleteSame here :( I discovered it today ... thanks :)
ReplyDeleteHey! You cured yet? And don't worry. You're not alone :) It's been over 2 years now, I am in a better place. But yes, I'm still not quite there yet :(
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHaha.. This is so ME!! I can completely relate :)
ReplyDeleteI am dealing with the same complex from last 3-4 days and Today i googled it.. just to know how many ppl on dis planet r dealing with it :D
The Strange thing is that -i wanna get rid of this and when i read your blog,i learned that u kinda okay living with this syndrome lifelong.
Whatever it is..im jz glad to know im not alone!
way to go gal! TC :)
Welcome to the club Divya ;) I've been dealing with this complex for 21 years now. And truth be told, it's not easy. But yes, when I think about what I just thought, I have a great laugh ;) People like us live to think. We have a world of our own which not many people would understand. I've been called crazy by all my friends. The fears which seem just so logical to me, make me a laughing stock for my friends. So just laugh along ;) God bless you. Take Care :)
DeleteOh my god. It is like someone read my mind. I too suffer with this complex. Is there a solution for this?
ReplyDeleteReally happy to know that there are so many others like me. I think the solution would be to just accept it and smile, because nothing can be done about it! So we might as well just smile and accept it that our brain just won't stop obsessing over our problems. It helps me sometimes to think that what has to happen, will happen. So its okay. But this doesn't always help. I just call up my mom. That definitely helps :)
Deletei sooo can relate to what you have written...even i have this similar complex.. i have to resort to anti depressants to stay happy and calm...such is life.
ReplyDeleteHey Sapna, good to know that there are more people like me. I have a flatmate out here in UK who is suffering from the same complex. He is from Egypt. So, I feel fine after talking to him for sometime. The other day we were just chatting when we started talking about how every time before I go out, the numerous things that I think of, that might happen during the day like, I might feel hungry, so I carry a tiffin, it might rain, so I carry an umbrella, I carry loads of medicines too. All this makes my bag so heavy. But I don't know, how do I get my brain to stop thinking so much!!!!!!! I feel like rephrasing Demi's song to Give your brain a break!!!! LOL.
DeleteOmg! I don't want this to come over wrong but I feel relieved that it's not only me with this..I'm having the same problem since the past few years and have been thinking about this term since a couple of months, now when I searched this I came across your blog and this is so very much recognizable!
ReplyDeleteI feel so sad and annoyed by this..What to do against it?!
I am so sorry for replying so late!!!I never got notified that I had a comment. Mad at gmail 😤
DeleteNow, to come back to your question- Are you cured yet? Since I took a year to reply back so I just wanted to see if we have made some progress in the meantime. If not then I have the cure. Smile. A lot. Seriously. Just smile. Everytime something tries to screw up your day - smile and think of one good memory. Keep thinking till you can actually feel it. And keep smiling. Smile from your heart. Smile from your tummy. Just smile.And the key is to keep breathing. That's all. I'm not saying that I have been cured. I was 22 when I wrote this. I am 24 now. And believe me, a lot has changed :) Hope this helps. If not, then have Nutella :) It's heaven :)
I really have this Meena kumari Syndrome . i think I love to hold on to this feeling so tight that I plan my entire day around my problems.
ReplyDeleteI love to feel sad about all the things which go wrong in my life.
i feel like its kinda "i am deliciously sad" .
Sorry about my late reply. Are you cured yet? If yes, then please do share with us :)
DeleteNot sad to be sad ....happy to be not happy :)
ReplyDeleteThat's an interesting way to put it, I must say :)
DeleteI think you should write often. The active voice that you've put into this article makes it humorous and depicts issues you've and might cure them too, partly.
ReplyDeleteAlso,this way you can end up preparing a autobiography. ;)
Point taken :) Thanks for the wise words of encouragement :) Will do so :)
DeletePoint taken :) Thanks for the wise words of encouragement :) Will do so :)
DeleteI think you should write often. The active voice that you've put into this article makes it humorous and depicts issues you've and might cure them too, partly.
ReplyDeleteAlso,this way you can end up preparing a autobiography. ;)